"Since my divorce, I've relied on a vibrator . Now I'm seeing a new man, and I'm having trouble climaxing. How can I get back to feeling stimulated by his touch?"
If you're only giving your body a vibrator's intense sensations, the more subtle touch of a finger or tongue is unlikely to be able to compete, explains Lou Paget, author of Orgasms .
"Start by cutting back on the vibrator use," Paget says.
"Next, on your own, begin exploring yourself with your fingers. You'll need to know what feels good to you in order to show your man the way."
If you're comfortable doing so, Paget suggests you demonstrate to your man how you like to be touched next time you're in bed, or you can guide his fingers along with your hand.
"What's great about a new partner is you're still learning what touches the other person enjoys, so there's room for exploration," Paget says.
"But there's a learning curve, so don't beat yourself up if your body isn't reacting just how it did to another partner's touch. Take the time to figure it out together."
Also, Paget adds, no need to keep your vibrator and your man separate why not bring the toy to bed and ask your guy to give you a guaranteed orgasm?
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